I had a teacher in high school who was a conspiracy theorist. One day, my teacher told the class that she was going to the restroom, and to not let anyone into the classroom while she was gone. She often kept the classroom door locked because she didn't want the government to take her USB drive, which she admitted to possibly having pornography on. A few minutes later, when I was innocuously doing my work, I heard a loud bang hit the classroom door. It couldn't have possibly been the teacher, as she had keys to the classroom and would never risk her job by damaging school property. The other students and I were bewildered, and we just kept staring at the door wondering who was trying to get in. Suddenly, the door is kicked open, and there stood my teacher, dyspenic and exasperated. She started yelling, "It's happening! The government is trying to kill us"! She made the entire class rush outside and then proceeded to tell us, "Look up, look at what they're doing to us! Oh no, it's worse than I thought! The government is putting microscopic aluminium and chemicals in the chem-trails! It's time to wake up, people"! When I looked up, all I saw were the vapour trails left in the sky by a jet. When I attempted to explain to my teacher that the vapour trails are left in the sky when the plane reaches a moist area of the atmosphere, as well as from condensation from the engine exhaust, she quickly rebutted with, "No, no. You don't know what you're talking about, you're not a plane expert (neither was she)... I know plane experts, and they've never said that... You need to wake up". The rest of the day was dedicated to watching a Youtube video in the classroom about an 80 year old woman saying that everyone needs to wake up because the government has been placing chemicals in the plane's fuel since she was a child (then how is she not dead yet?).
Are you wondering why "wake up" was underlined three times during that story? The reason for this is because it's the most common phrase used by the conspiracy theorists. Conspiracy theorists love to believe that they are the only ones who are truly cognizant on the real motives of the government, and everyone else is just a sheep (sheeple) going along with what the government tells them because they can't think for themselves.
To better understand the conspiracy theorist, you must become the conspiracy theorist.
"You are alone. Everyone else is blindly following the nefarious government, but not you, because you are not a sheep following the herd, but rather an individual seeking independence. Like a two week old kitten, you have opened your eyes for the first time. You realise that everything has been tainted by the government: phones, cars, food, water, pets, planets in the Aquarius Dwarf galaxy, and even the internet. Using your handy-dandy Google, you begin your research on the malevolent government. After discovering the unscrupulous deeds that the government has done through Youtube videos and dubious websites, your thoughts begin racing. "They've been doing this to ME this entire time? How could they... NO, how could I be so foolish!? Why did I even trust them to begin with? Gasp... the government has been controlling my mind"! Disgruntled with this sudden realisation, you make many accounts on various online forums to help other people open their eyes to the events conspiring. "Everyone, I know this sounds ridiculous, but the government has been controlling everyone through subliminal messages in the air waves and mind control serum in the water. Don't listen to the music or drink the water, people! Wake up"! You try to tell them the truth, but they don't believe you. After being labelled a charlatan by the other forum members, you begin realising that they are already under the government's control, and there's nothing you can do to change their lissencephalic minds. Silhouetted by a candle light in your room, you ponder your existence and the mysteries of the universe. You become increasingly paranoid; every footstep and every creak startles you. The government is on to you. You then decide that you have to act now and you have to act fast; you need more power and you need your voice to be heard. After chatting with several conspiracy theorists on Youtube, you have been provided with the information you need to defeat the government and give the people back the control they deserve. You then write many barely comprehensible articles about how the government is negatively affecting the lives of the ordinary people. Over the next year, your articles go from having 10 views to having 50 views. The increasing stress of being an illustrious conspiracy theorist then inundates you, so you begin going to alleyways to meet suspicious individuals in trench coats and fedoras, where you will inevitably die of a drug overdose".
 |
Something a lot of conspiracy theorists fail to understand, other than how to get veritable evidence for their claims, is that the government doesn't tell the general public everything for a reason. Think about it, do you tell everyone everything about yourself? Of course not! You probably have a dirty secret that you don't want getting out because it could sully your reputation, but you're still a good person overall. This may or may not be how the government is. Whether the reason that they don't tell you everything is because they don't want everyone panicking or it's to protect everyone from themselves, it's their business. Yes, their actions do affect you and you should have at least an idea of what they're doing, but not everyone will react to the news the same as you. You could be a reticent and calm person who, when given bad news, won't react much to it, but there are also people who react to bad news by lighting cars on fire and then chanting incantations to change the outcome of the already decided event. You saw how people reacted over the Zimmerman court trial, which had nothing to do with them. People were making death threats on the internet and protesting in the streets about one trial. It was one trial out of many, but while there were many, much worse trials that didn't garner as much attention, everyone focused on that solitary trial. If people reacted that way to something that didn't affect them in any way, what makes you think that the government would divulge a plan to you that does directly affect you?
As the conspiracy theorists are ubiquitous, there is no way to avoid them. They could be on any chat form, any blog, on any website. There is also no way to get rid of a conspiracy theorist. As the sheeple (which is everyone except them) can never change the obstinate conspiracy theorist's beliefs, there is no reason to argue with them, since you can never win. So the best thing to do when you're stuck in an altercation with a conspiracy theorists is to walk away. Sure, they might think that you're a faithless coward for walking away, but it's better than wasting your own time arguing with someone over the internet who won't even give your opinion a chance.
Coming up next: The Mystical Magical Psychic Vampire
Sources:
https://www.youtube.com/
As the conspiracy theorists are ubiquitous, there is no way to avoid them. They could be on any chat form, any blog, on any website. There is also no way to get rid of a conspiracy theorist. As the sheeple (which is everyone except them) can never change the obstinate conspiracy theorist's beliefs, there is no reason to argue with them, since you can never win. So the best thing to do when you're stuck in an altercation with a conspiracy theorists is to walk away. Sure, they might think that you're a faithless coward for walking away, but it's better than wasting your own time arguing with someone over the internet who won't even give your opinion a chance.
Coming up next: The Mystical Magical Psychic Vampire
Sources:
https://www.youtube.com/